The last of the last

Last weeks trip was life changing.
And the changes continue.
Today, my life turns yet again.
I am not ok with it.
You see, the trip had far more details than I could go into hear, besides, none you crackheads want to read about my personal life and loves.
So I am packing right now, well taking a break to say good bye but still...
I have to go.
Where? I don't know yet.
But I do know that I am giving up on so much of the future just because.
Because.
Oregon has always sucked for me. I hate the rain, I hate the endless days you lose to the miserable weather. I hate the fatasses and the old people that inhabit the city I live in. I hate the tweakers, the white trash, the crappy surf and the cold.
I have tried to make this place my place.
But I am sick of it.

Last week at this time, I was out in trunks, surfing 4' fun point waves, loving it.
Today, its pouring rain, 54 degree's and just shitty. Another day lost to the weather.
Hate this place.
Because its such a compromise and I hate compromise.
Can't do it any more, too old for it.

As some of you know, I write a bit, not much here but on other sites and blogs. I am an intense and somewhat wacko guy and it often comes through in my words. I scare people but I often make them laugh at the same time.
I wrote a brief synopsis about last week on my other, more personal blog.
All hell broke loose this morning.
Because I wrote about being human.
Sorry.

So I am off to who knows where.
My life is like that.
While its been rather calm for 9 years, it seems I needed to wake up to the dull thud of time marching on.
And realize its marching along and not letting me do my thing.
I am getting older but I quit growing up when I was 27.
Figure it out yourselves.

So I have to make some sort of decision.
Get out the map, tear off everything North of Coos Bay, Oregon and East of 101/Coast Highway. The coast is my home, its where I grew up and I hope its where I die.
But not today.

I am close to broke but I am very broken.
I am about to give it all away.
And hopefully start anew.
Not going to miss much but everything.

Figure that out too.

See ya kids, be kind, do good works, pick up litter everywhere you go, feed the hungry, see a need and fill it, give a wave, stoke a kid, love hard, fuck harder and never ever push the
panic button.

Like I am about to do.

Time to flip my lucky quarter.
Heads, see you in the water.
Tails?